Don’t know them by their words, know them by their actions. That’s where the truth lies. People can tell you anything, but do their actions match their words…
At this stage in life, I am really beginning to understand the phrase “Sometimes you will never know or understand the reasons why”. To start off on the lighter side of things, I will never understand why you are now supposed to only space one time after a period. How were those of us who went through school a long time ago supposed to know that. I didn’t get the memo and it still looks weird to me. I went through an editorial training at work the other day and there are so many grammar changes that I had no clue about. Who makes up these rules? Anyway, on to the more serious side…
I went through some things in life that made me extremely angry. I went through things that stripped me financially, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. I thought that the magical mystical God that I’ve learned about all of my life would protect me from some, if not all, of those things. That is no disrespect to God at all, I love & honor my Creator immensely, but it is a slight jab at how God has been presented to me in church over time. If you are living, life will happen. There is no protection from that. You live, you make decisions, you act, you react, you listen or your don’t and you deal with what comes next. When you refuse to deal, you will never learn the lesson, you will never heal and the lesson will keep repeating until you learn it.
I went through 5 long years of dealing with some very serious spiritual “stuff”. That’s all I can say about it right now but it stole A LOT from me. I guess I can say that I let it, but I feel more like things were just taken from me by force (spiritually speaking). That time in my life has ended and I’m on a new path, but sometimes I ask “did it have to happen like that….was there no other way”. It is one of those things that I will never know the reason behind, but I am glad that it brought me to the place where I am.
Whether it’s that negative experience or another one, one thing that I am realizing is if I don’t let it go and move on from trying to understand why, I let that situation hold power over me, my thoughts and my life. It was an experience and for whatever reason, I had to go through it and now it’s time to get past it and move forward. I know that I have to face whatever comes like a “beast”!! One of my new favorite lines is from a Big Sean song (he’s from Detroit, MI like me), the line is “I woke up in beast mode”! To me its like setting goals and smashing everyone of them like a champ! When challenges or fear come, don’t shrink and don’t get stuck in the “why me” phase. Of course the thought will come but instead of trying to figure out why it happened. Stand tall, get in beast mode and handle it! They key is to get through it…don’t setup shop in it.
I think when “stuff” comes and “stuff” happens, God, the universe and life is trying to tell us two things. One, it’s time for change and two, you got this!
I just can’t get with this thing of putting prayers to God on social media. Like when someone makes their status message a prayer… I guess I’m thinking of it in this sense; my relationship with God, while obvious to others, is private to me. I pray all of the time for people, situations, things, myself and most times to just commune with God. To me that relationship and my prayer time (outside of when I attend a prayer service or I’m at church) is so personal and private and so special and intimate, I can’t see reducing it to a post on social media for show. Just my view…
Speakin’ my piece -E
When I was in the shower this morning, I was thinking about how often things are left unsaid. In the past I have left a lot of things unsaid for the simple fact that I didn’t want to hurt someone’s (family/friends) feelings. But for the majority of things that I kept quiet about or held back on, it was in regards to things that were done or said to me, that were hurtful and sometimes just plain old mean. Over the years I have become a MUCH more outspoken person and I love that. It was all about personal growth. I learned that when something needs to be said, say it. I also learned that sometimes you just have to let some things go, learn to forgive and move on. Living free from situations and people is one of the best decisions that you can ever make in life.
Time has a funny way of changing things and people. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, it just is what it is. Give a person or a situation enough time and they/it will change or be forced to. As I sit back and think of the whirlwind my own life has been for the past 10 years, I also think about all the changes that I’ve seen in myself, family, friends, coworkers and social media connects.
Over time, believers turn into nonbelievers, friends turn into strangers, and lovers turn into someone “we” used to know. I’ve seen dreams come true and on the flip side, hope fade. I’ve seen love turn to hate and anger turn to humility. I’ve seen media feed lies to the minds of people and I’ve seen some of those people believe it and develop fear and hate because of it. I’ve seen people that I know create these “new personas” on Facebook, Instagram and Twitter and it is nothing like who they really are. It amazes me, yet I’m glad that I and a trillion others prefer to be and stay grounded, focused and REAL.
The older I get and with more time that passes, I have learned to let go. I have come to the point when I recognize that when something or someone has served its purpose in my life and that picture becomes crystal clear, I simply let go. When someone causes uncomfortable thoughts and feelings, when they frustrate you to no end and when their ideals and beliefs are 100% different than yours and everything turns into an argument or a debate…it’s time. Your circle may get smaller, but it will get stronger, and that’s what we all need. I used to hang on to relationships based on how long I’ve known someone, but that’s not a reason to keep someone in your life if they add absolutely no value.
Moral of the story, be YOU, stay TRUE and keep it REAL. In doing that, you will always make the right decisions for you.